A manipulative relationship is where one person has control. This manipulative person will do whatever they can to exercise that control. They will aim to manipulate their partner for their own gain and seek to control every aspect of their life. This type of relationship can be hugely damaging – it can leave the manipulated person a shadow of their former self. Knowing how to recognize and handle a manipulative relationship is hugely important, and we take a look how below:
Stage 1 – Recognizing
First you must actually recognize that you are in a manipulative relationship. To help identify manipulation, you must remember your basic human rights and ask yourself the following:
- Am I being treated with respect?
- Am I allowed to express my opinions and feelings?
- Can I set my own priorities?
- Can I say no without a sense of guilt?
- Can my opinion differ from my partners?
- Do you feel good about yourself in the relationship?
- Do you feel the relationship is equal?
If the answer to these questions is NO then your partner is more than likely manipulating you. Search your soul and fine the answer to these questions – only then can you look at dealing with the problem.
Stage 2 – Handling
So how do you deal with a manipulator? First and foremost, you must learn to say NO. No is a powerful word that can stop a manipulator in their tracks. Furthermore, you must stand up for yourself and challenge their way of thinking. Ask them questions about their behaviour and actions – make them question if what they are doing is right. Also use time to your advantage – you should never have to agree to anything on the spot – “I’ll think about it” can work wonders.
Hopefully this small guide will prove invaluable. Once you have identified the manipulation, and confronted your partner, you must then look at if you think this person is capable of changing. Some manipulators are simply hard-wired that way whereas others could simply manipulate due to insecurities or some form of underlying fear. Find the reason and decide for yourself if the relationship can continue.